RIP, Rick Perry's Presidential Campaign

Poor Rick Perry, he looks so ponderous and careworn. Photo from Gawker

Time to include Rick Perry in the list of casualties from the Republican race. The Texas governor dropped his presidential campaign and opted to support Newt Gingrich so...the race is down to Mitt Romney, a Massachusetts "conservative" (as if anyone from that state can be conservative) none of GOP bigwigs seem to like, and Newt Gingrich, an adulterer. Looks like things are really looking up for this country. Oh wait, no they aren't.

Besides, it's too early for me to be hearing about campaigning crap anyway. 2012 has barely begun, let's start the race around then. And limit the amount candidates can spend so that our TVs aren't plugged up with negative ads all the time.

Seriously, what kind of a name is Newt?

So what's next? According to everyone who pays attention to politics (i.e., not me), South Carolina. The primary is scheduled in two days, so this offers Gingrich a big chance to beat Romney in the polls. Which...is good? I can't stand politics so I pay as little attention to it as possible. Personally, we need to wipe the entire field out and start over, but that's just my opinion.

In Perry's speech, he said that he could see no way forward for him in the campaign in 2012 and that our best hopes lay with Gingrich, a "conservative visionary who can transform our country." He also said the race has "never been about the candidates," a blatant falsehood if I ever heard one. Never about the candidates? Really? I'm pretty sure the goal of any campaign for office is to sell yourself as the best candidate.

Yaaay comedy everywhere! (Photo from Christian Science Monitor/AP)

I think the best solution is to vote for Stephen Colbert. Here's hoping he really does decide to run; I could use a real reason to watch the debates.